THE PLAGUE AND HOW I GOT IT

I went to a restaurant and I caught the plague,
It was the leek salad that made my bod drag,
And, though I professed I was dying,
The waitress accused me of lying,
Because, I asked for leftovers and a doggie bag.

ALFRED THE VANE

At his end Alfred suffered from insanity,
Because he couldn't overcome his great vanity,
For Alfred saw himself growing old,
Graying hair and skin fold,
But, ignored the greater humanity.