WANTED S'MORES, AND I GOT SORES

 I went to Canada, to buy stuff to make tasty s'mores,

I had to sneak into the place, with my boat that has oars,

Not a very easy ride,

There's sea monsters, at low tide,

After battling monsters, my body was covered with sores, 

BAD KING JAR HEAD

I use to be a great, and powerful, big king,

I ruled over the entire Earth, everything,

But, they all said I went too far,

Now, my head's pickled in a jar,

And, the People taunt me, with mean songs that they sing.

MOVING TO GREENLAND TO ESCAPE THE MADNESS

 Retirement savings has tanked so much, I'll have to move to Greenland, to retire,

I'm not so smart that I know why,

But, the stock market, it done die,

And, I borrowed money for some heats and eats, to my mortgaged dump, I say goodbye.